My Life..

My days are getting better now. Thanks to all my friends around me! My collegeue appreaciate my presence and they are willing to share their knowlege with me. Im glad. 
Im blessed.


I just had a wonderful birthday prepared by my friends and "cousin" haha. I enjoyed it so much.
Countless thanks to say.


And not forgetting them .. My beloved ADC budss..  They too! celebrated my birthday. 



Pics speaks a thousand word. I was overjoyed.


Thanks and happy birthday Bro! My only and ONE bro! 21st birthday..!


This day should be his day.. BUT we just cant resist our temptation.. SHOPPING!!!
sorry bro.. we just love to shop cos girls are born to shop! hahahah


But we girls still make ur day right bro? You are fortunate that u are surround by all this beautiful girls.. appreaciate our presence !
Cos u will miss it when You get to served ur 2 years in army..hahaha...

I guess i have to be back here writing my thoughts and my life again. WHAT a drastic change in my life now being a emergency dept STAFF NURSE. Its my dream though i never knew that i had a chance to get in as my result is not that fantastic. But miracle do happen u see..

23thmarch ( what a day to remember) -  To NYP to get my transcript -> Cab down to SGH to  Register my Singapore nursing board licence -> Cab down to TTSH to join in the ED orientation.. hectic day to start with. 

24thmarch - First day out to the floor to work in my scrub suit as a STAFF NURSE. Get scolded from a ASSITANT NURSE from the ward while sending my patient up. *idiotic* Bek chek

25thmarch- 1th april - I was having so much stress at work as i cant meet my expectation and i didnt know how do other staff think 
                                      of me?Am i too slow ? Am i a burden to them ? I always get unpleasant expression from some of the 'staff ' 
                                       but Im really trying very hard to make myself useful during work, but do people noticed it? Im still under a 6months probation programme, so during this 6 months if im not up to standard i'll be kick out of the dept. This really scares me.
It took me awhile to settle down and set things right.. I even breakdown at some point of time..

2th april - 5 april - i did 4 cannulations with the seniors staff.. im so proud of myself.. im glad that im finally back to myself
                                 my confidence bring my smile back.. But im really tired.. i need red bull to boost up my energy!

Tommorrow will be my first day of hospital orientation!  cool.. 1 month counting from now..

Haix.. what is family? do anyone really knows? I just dont feel that im part of my family.. nobody knows how i feel.. nobody

Coming to the last week of the gerontology posting. Had learned lots of things from documentation to "advanced" bed side nursing, it was pretty tough for me for during the first few days as i had lost touch of my nursing skills. I enjoyed myself in the ward with so many staff nurse who are willing to teach us and guide us thru. However, despite working hard and be serious in my work my CI still gave me a bad (Mid comment) Haiz. I was really bothered by her comment as it really pulls me down alot. She had also said that my skills are still a year 2 standard and im one of the weakest student seeing my skills on the first 2 days and she gave me that comment. So unfair! hmm.. gerontology , ED , OT - gerontology had the highest weightage ! So demoralize la! hmm..Anyway whatever had happened had already happened.. what to do..? pray hard that i wont fail lo.. Today was my first day passing report.. 3 cases in total.. felt very good... very very good! hee.. cool.. but it seems like the staff nurse wasnt listening to me despite me standing in front of her.. At the point of time i felt so "invisible" nobody seems to care.. forget it la.. as long as i had open my mouth and read out the case in front of them i felt contented. Yup ! At least i am somebody there .. haha.. happy happy... hope that tomorrow will be better DAY=) ohya.. meanwhile im waiting for my RESULTS.. Heartbeat : 120 bpm.. Tachycardia le.. oh no.. nervous..nervous..!!!! haha.. awaiting...... pending....

This time round it was a tough lap Im struggling hoping someone would save me. I had a feeling that i wont be able to do well for my exam and the feeling is getting stronger when each day passes.. I had so much problem with so many things in hand, i wish i could just let go but i know i couldnt. Look into the mirror i see layered of dark rings and i wonder when would it be vanished, i couldnt bring myself to really smile. how? I hope you were here..

Today is my Napfa test.. was pretty excited and my tummy filled with caterpillar! heee.... For the past 3 days i had been training for my 2.4km run with my Bro (james) how nice of him huh! 1st day of training i remembered my timing was 15mins 27 sec (worse timing ever) 2nd training was 14mins 10 sec  at least slightly better! There comes my Big day.. I ran and my timing was 13 mins 14 sec.. Applause please .. haha.. really proud of myself and my bro..at least those training i had did not go to waste. yeah~ so happy.. At of the station which is the standing board jump my left leg muscle Pull (cramp) very pain la.. i went to look for deep heat and appiled like there's no tomorrow! haha after awhile it started to Burn! ouch! hee.. And during the 2.4 run.. both of my shoelace came off and i ran 6 rounds with shoelace dangling, i didnt want to stop and tie it as im afraid it will affect my timing..Fortunately i didnt trip and fall ( If not it will be so un-glam * i cant imagine it.. ) Anyway want to know my other result? hee.. i know is not as good but at least i aim for a gold and i got it ! YES!

Sit Ups: 56 - Standing Board Jump:176cm - Sit and reach: 40cm - Inclined pull up: 11 - shuttle run:10.69sec - 2.4km Run: 13mins 14sec

********************
Tess:  Thanks for pacing with me..=)
Bettina: Im glad that you are okay and if u want to train i can train with u .. step by step.. no worries.. jia you!
Desiree: Im proud of u.. =) and sorry i was not there to support u ..
Anna& Alice: hey our training helps right? hee.. proud of u too.. you guys did it..!
James( brother ) : Thanks for those trainings.. i know you are proud of me.. hee.. thanks alot..But without you i may not make it..! 
Owe u one! cheers..!
*********************

Recently i just joined an adventure Race on the 28 june 2008 Pinnacle race organised by Ngee Ann polytechnic. It was the second Race i ever participated, all thanks to eddry ! my hero! He was there to support me and motivate me when i was at the urge of giving up..Me and eddry just participate for the sake of having Fun and experience , we arent thinking of winning at all because of my weak stamina and endurance.. hee..but i will try my best to race with him till the end.. 

Anyway, we won the race and came in first..i know is hard to believe but the medal was real! It was just lucky...nothing to be happy about ,dont feel like talking much about it.. thats all.. =) Thanks to my hero.. 

This month is the most happening month of the year .. i went for 2 expedition one is jerangkang waterfall(malaysia) and the other one is Kayaking expedition (singapore!) hmm.. let me briefly talk about how fun jerangkang is..

Approx. 60 of us were divided into 2 groups as we were a big group. Initially, their plan was for group 1 to head to berkelah waterfall and group 2 to Jerangkang waterfall. I was really sad as my group were the ones going  bekelah. Then i was so reluctant as i had went before. But i just felt something was wrong.. how can they seperate us when there's isnt enough experienced teacher Incharge to be with us. I kept asking tess mr wilfred and many many more people but they still insist saying that we were going different ways. 

Not knowing that i was kept in the dark for the past 2 weeks til the day 9thjune i was in sch with my backpack.. They announced we are actually heading to the same destination which is jerangkang!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh gosh..i stared at them..then started laughing scream for joy hahaha..Happy happy happy..yeah...

1st day- Reaching school at 930am Start packing all the stuff till 5 pm finally set off. ( wah almost 10 over hours to pack our stuff !) see how " fast and efficient " are we? haha. oh ya thanks qy for lending me her sport shoes as i didnt want to wear my favorite shoe there...hee=)  Then We took the bus to kuntan approximately 6 hours journey backside almost got burned! Reached the mosque and we settle down and dozed off ..

2nd day-  Took the lorry to the jerangkang base camp..the journey was.. was.... was... like sitting in a bumper car without cushioning ,i think for every 10 secs i shouted Ouch! goodness.. Anyway Once we reached we trek up to the campsite where we stayed for 2 days!  hmm..set our tents and basha (shelter). After things done.. we trek up to the top of the waterfall i was with Qing ying (first aider) she was one of my best motivator.. ! Applause.. hee. she was so nice lah..she help me alot during the trekking up and down. And andy too..( life saver) haha another hero.. "save my life" when i fell..hee. We trek down through the water route where we had to swim across river to river. It was so fun! Though i do not know how to swim but once you get to gulp some water and use you leg to kick and kick and kick while in the water, eventually you will know how to swim. hee. there was a part where i had to challenge myself to jump from a height into water..! My hand immediately went numb and cramp ( too nervous ) haha.. funny.. i stood there for a few mins.. mins... mins... tell myself I didnt want to regret !..... I JUMP! Arhggg.. Splash.. i gulps lots of water loh.all went into my nose.. wrong canal ! haha..felt so uncomfortable but is worth it..

3rd- Stay at the campsite..play and play...when i wanted to cross the river the current swiped off my SLIPPER arghh... very sad la. very sad..hump...='( After that i tried abseiling down and rock climb up the rock wall beside the waterfall.. it was fun.. never try the real rock before..ohhwhoo.. Night time.. Charlene lend me her own slipper to me while she is still wearing her own wet shoe i felt really bad but must thank her..hmmp.. ThANK YOu! ahah .. when all the exciting program ended.. Me and tess decided to find a space to talk.. im freaked out as i saw "Something"  really scares me.. my god.. i told tess we better get to somewhere near the basha..haha.. then comes along Qing ying join in the conversation.. slowly tess fell asleep.. Left me and Qing ying continue and we share alot of things.. even the part where i didnt even know that she actually exist in ADC when she had been ADC for a 1 year plus make me felt bad .. i only know her when i came to this expedition hhaa opps. sorry=) ... 

4thday- Dip into the water Early in the morning around 7 am.. freezing sia ! you can even see everyone was shivering haha! When we are about to pack our stuff and set off.. i found something strange in my bag. i took out.. A BIG ROCK! Dont know which Joker puts into my bag! arhgg.... luckily i took it out before setting off if not i will be carrying unecessary stuff all the way to singapore.haha..
We took the same lorry to mosque and eat out lunch and off we go.. Finally after the long long journey we finally reach our school! yeah..haha we ordered pizza to eat ..debriefing.. then home sweet home!=)

Lastly People whom i wish to thank..

Tess - help me alot with cooking..and encourage me !
Qing ying- Best Motivator! listener and always be there for me ..
Charlene- Your slipper!
Vin and Rafi- you guys are great leaders.. we are safe in your hands ! haha..
And many many more lah.. too many to mention!

* As for Kayaking trip... To be continued.. sleeping now..=) ZZZZ

 Today was not exactly a good day.. certain reason make me drop my tears... didnt feel like talking about it.. i will continue my journal once im back from kayaking expedition(this fri to sun)..take care my friend..

So many things to worry about.. so many project to do... so many test and exam to study.. so many so many..   3 more days i'm heading to malaysia,kuantan bekalah waterfall. Have not even packed my things yet.. why? so messy..i dont like what i am now... im starting to get impatient again and tends to show attitude to my friends and my loves one which i do not want it.haii... sorry =\ 
And hope those friends around me who are having some family problem can solved it quickly as you can.. by running away is not an option and is just running away from the problem.. smile and enjoy your everyday life.. take care.. *remember your friends do care about you..

 Today is a pretty hectic day i was late for school, reason being-> wrote the wrong timetable! How sotong am i !  Tomorrow  still have to pay back an hour lesson for nothing. A waste of my time ! My god. Tomorrow is tuesday what shall i do ? oh gosh.. exam coming, stress coming nearer, a piles of book right in front of me awaiting. 
I cant describe how was my mood today..not very good and not very bad ( or maybe it was the monday blues again) what had happen to me.. I didnt really smile through my heart  it was a fake smile. Feel like in me there's something bothering me but i just couldnt described it or say.. Or maybe because without DS LITE im lonely again. hmm.. one day i should have bought one for( I, me, myself ) it kind of occupying my day. yeah..

      MY BEST FRIEND !

 

 

 

Outing day today! Go for 1 hr lesson in school and out we go... ! Today i must have put on a couple of pounds because i had spent most of my money on eating. We went to suntec city and then to gelare for waffles and cheese cake , went to TCC for wedges, went to holland V with my frends for subway and lastly went to coffee club for dessert! hahah spent almost 40 dollars on eating for myself only !
Oh nooo terrible..horrible..hee.. anyway today i enjoy every bits of my time.. HAHA... OKay enough of eating ! sleeping time..! good nite!

Sometimes we ourselves didn't realize we actually left a few months together in school.. i cant describe how it feel like but is just not good, now i beginning to regret how little time i spent with my gangs. Just the short 3 years i feel like there isn't enough memories to leave with me. Now im trying very hard to leave memories and spent a good time with my schoolmates, most probably the last time to have a school life. After spending 15 years being a student,  i see many things and at some point of time i just hate being a student .But right now i don't  cos i didnt want  to step into an adult life and the materialistic world really scary. I sound ridiculous right? But is really true.. i'm afraid that nobody is there to guide me and lead me the right way im afraid being alone im afraid that i cant handle stress im afraid being bullied and no one gonna stand for me. How?

  So let's now imagine my sandwich..
A layer with roman lettuce (i love it) with mayo spread to go along
A layer with grill bacons 5 pieces of that.
A layer with melted cheese (2 pieces) and greenies
A layer of ham with pickled with honey mustard!
Isnt that yummy.. slurp.. okay tomorrow i'm gonna make one for myself!

 

Finally i brought my mood back to school..felt much better already thank you my friends! oh my i can tahan without dinner today, no appetite = slim down !! yes !! hee... let me see how much do i weigh......................... STILL THE SAME ! Do  laugh at me.. i know you are now.. stop stop! So sad ! should have stop all my junk food is adding on to my weigh now.. hai.. hmm.. tomorrow is the biathlon day ! Hope nothing will happen *pray hard* Desiree help arh.. help to pray la..=) hee..
  
When all sorts of gods in heaven come together...hee

Today i just dun feel right... really felt so listless and restless.. sorry my friends didnt join in the fun today .. monday somemore hai .. Tomorrow i will try to bring my lameness out again .. hope tomorrow will be better.. -__-

Early in the morning 6am i leave my house and take a 1 hr train journey to clarke quay. I was probably too excited or something had happen with *somebody* just before the day i did not sleep well, and was too tired to do anything... Just about the start of the event we were so lost we didnt know what to do              (* because we didnt make it for the Mass briefing 3 days ago.) therefore we miss out alot of clues instruction and hints............. BEEPPPPP... goes off... my adrenaline in my body gushes up haha the hunt had started..Without clues and hints we head to nowhere except monkey see monkey do...hahhaha funny..
After a few trys we get the hang of it and smoothly go through bit by bit.. though was tough * the walking part from clarke quay to boat quay then to Robertson(if im not wrong)quay... plus the scorching sun ..wah.. but we still manage to complete.. haha yeah..
Great sense of achievement..but i didnt bring any hope of winning the race or even get into top 10..so didnt quite bother but still join in the prize presentation ... none of the top 3 is from us..but when comes to 10 consolation prize we came in FIRST !!!!!! so out of the 50 groups we came in 4th.. my god !!!!! im damm shock but happy.. so I went up the stage to get the $50 voucher  i get to choose any organisation like haagen Dazs, nike, adidas, NYDC, many many more. Under stressed i didnt know what to get.. so anyhow picked.. i picked addidas.. haha when i got back to my group think back why am i so silly ? hhaa what can i buy from Adidas? My god! so i wait till the end i exchange the voucher with the teacher in charge... In his hand he still have one more voucher that is not given to the group as they did not come for the prize presentation. Guess what the voucher im going to exchange with is Haagen Dazs !!!!! ICE CREAM yeah... 


Soon after we went to look the ice cream shop realised is just beside us only... we went in and ordered a seventh heaven !! like earthquake very nice with 7 scoops of ice cream but to use up all the money we ordered an additional scoop of ice cream.. but i think since we are here why not try the waffles ? so i went to cancel the Additional scoop of ice cream and ordered the waffles. haha... But the manager from haagen dazs *mr toh* complimentary us with the that additional scoop of ice cream ... so nice of him !  hmm... 
 
wei ni and me...

   
kamar * first lady* and me..
 
  
$50 Haagen Dazs voucher !!


Tadahhh... known as the seventh heaven


ohhhhh.. Dry ice.. cool.. just like eating the ice cream in heaven...


 In just 10 mins.. down to earth ... slurp.. yummy!


Going home to sleep... zzz..=)

 Afterall We made a good deal...=)

 Today.... i brought baby to the vet to remove her stitches but when i reached there it was CLOSED!! 
i should have called the vet clinic to ask first..goodness. hmmpx.
Anyway im very excited about tomorrow's treasure hunt at clarke quay organised by singapore polytechnic, hoping to get the grand prize hahaha...






    thinking about the treasure tomorrow....         can i win? hmmm....   

                              

             if i would to find and win the treasure grand prize i will be...................................







i will scream for joy.............. arhhh........ hahaha .. wish me luck! 8)

hmm.. what a day? Today's first lecture was at 12pm and when i reach school it was already 12pm! my god... Then i rush.. rush.. rush.. finally reach the lecture hall and i quickly "tap" my admin card phew~ relieved..so i entered...THERE WAS NO ONE THERE !!!! arghhhh  Knowing i was at the wrong lecture hall i quickly rushed down to the other lecture hall and 'TAP'.. it was exactly 1210pm! The 10 min grace save me..!! yeah! What a graceful day hahah ...
 Next lesson was at 2 pm (tutorial) and im wearing shorts and slippers both is a NONO in NYP.. And worst is i need to present group work to my class and teacher arghh.. knew my teacher will say something.. after the class she come forward and .... whack my backside and said.. loretta next time do not wear shorts to school anymore is breaking school rule.. okay?! haha.. okay.. whatever.. 
After school i went orchard with those 2 noisy one.. hmm we went zara and i tried a tube dress ( dark blue striped) quite tight fitting.. but is pretty nice..hmm..but not worth to buy.. it cost $59.90 it think.. expensive !! hee..

My journal just born today! 23 May 2008...ohh yeahh..  yeah this is me =)

so in future i can write anything i want here. Pretty excited to start on this but it seems like there's nothing on my head right now.Or maybe i can talk about what i did today? One word to describe 'BORED' ! Just came back from TTSH (Place where it nurture me to be a missy) but today im there to be a visitor because something happen...hmmp nothing to worry about now cos everything is FINE =) After that i went back home to enter into my adventurous dream.. yeah so far thats about it..Forward to see anything happen to my school tomorrow hopefully nothing bad. * i mean today. hee..